Three Times’ Beating Monster
人物：T唐僧 S:孙悟空 E:猪八戒 J:沙僧
B:白骨精 B1:B变成的村姑 B2:B变成的太婆
T: Emitofo,do you know where we are now?
S: Look,master （凑近T）……（T、S一齐转向E）
T: Bajie!How Many times I have told you, nof to bring these pictures of beautiful girls with you!
E: Oh,master!Forgive me（伸手拿回）
T: （缩手）I’ll keep it for you until we reach the west
T: Emitofo,nothing is lust,lust is nothing! Map?
E: （递）Here.Em…… we have arrived in White Tiger Mountain!Ah I can’t walk on any more!（坐）My stomach doesn’t allow So.
S: Fat Pig!
E: Monkey,if you dare to say these two words once again,I will ,I will……
S: You will what（凶相）？
E: （软禁）I will help you catch fleas（跳蚤）。
T:（轻咳）Wukong,factually,I am a bit hungry Could you go to get me some food?
E: You see ,master is hungry,too!
T: Baijie!Don’t forget who ate my last meal!
J: But master,if a monster comes while brother monkeg is away……
T: Em……It is a problem.Wukong,do you have any idea?
S: No problem!（安装）（B已躲在一旁偷看）
E: This is……？
S: Electric net!I have learnt the energy of electricity from master’s books. So I made this. No monster can approach you if you stay in it!
T: Em……Wukong, you are becoming more and more scientific! Emitofo, knowledge is power!
T: Let’s play cards!（三人开始打牌）音乐《斗地主》
B: Hm!Hm!Electric net?You are too childish.（变成B1）
B1: （接近三人，望着）Can I join you?
T: I’m sorry,lady. We are playing Fighting Against Landlord and three people are enough.
B1: （在一旁观看）Oh,Chance! Bomb!
B1: Double King!
T: Oh…I win! Em……，Lady,you are a master-hand. Come in and teach me!（准备开电网门）
T: （气愤）Wukong! Look what have done! She is my teacher!
S: She is a monster!
S: Oh,please don’t……
T:It’s too late!（唱）Once more……you open the door…（泰坦尼克主题曲，走音离谱）
T: （呛住，咳）Wukong,I’m disappointed with you!
B: （真身出现）Hm!Sun Wukong, I’ll teach you a lesson!（变成太婆）
B2:Hello,have you seen my daughter?
S: （咬牙切齿）You monster, I’ll beat you into hell!（S追打B2,B2躲至T身后，S打，不想打到T头，T晕，S再打死B2）
E&J: Are you Ok, master?（扶T）
J: Look,（伸食指）how many?
T:Two……（晕乎乎地）Sun Wukong, game over!（变成B3）
B3: （看到B1,B2尸体）Oh…，my daughter, my wife! Who did it?!!（哭喊）
S: I’ll kill you, monster!（打）
T: （想阻止，未及）You,you……（险些晕，E,J扶住 ）You have killed three lives!
S: No,they are not human beings!They are created by monster!
T: Monster?You are a real monster!Never let me see you,go!!
S: （悲，离去）（音乐，营造 "假"悲伤气氛）《人鬼情未了》
E: Master, brother Monkey is……
T: Scratch! Don't mention that guy any more!
B: （出现） Ha,ha,ha!（三尸体B1,B2,B3在B招手后"飘"走）
T: （惊）You are……
B: How foolish you are ,Mr Tang!（E,J去阻斗，被击退）
B: （抓住T）I'll enjoy your meat and blood,ha,ha……
S: （悄悄走到B后，打B,B晕）A thousand years later.
E: Oh,Brother Monkey!
J: Our hero is back!
T: I,I can't understand……What happened?
S: Master,your IQ needs increasing! This monster changed its appearance into three shapes in order to cheat you!
T: How,how did you find out?
S: （沉默）……Monkey's intuition（直觉）
N: Excuse me, where is the cniminal?
S; Ah……you are too late ,Nezha!（对T）I've called the police.
N: （摇醒B）You are under arrest .（出示证件）You have the right to remain silent If you give up the right, anything you will say can and will be against you in a court of law!（带走B）
T: Wukong（S不理T）I admit my mistake this time（S仍不理）I'm sorry（小声）
T: I'm sorry.
S: Em? Louder,please?
T: I……am……sorry……（S 捂耳）（音乐响）《敢问路在何方》（这个放伴奏）
T: Let's go guys!（ 歌）
S: You are carrying the luggage, I am leading the horse.
E: Say goodbye to the sun, Welcome evening glow.
J: Sleeping on the ground, again we set out set out, again we set out.
T.S.E.J: Ah……Ah…… Sleeping on the ground again we set out.
T: One after the other the seasons go by,and ohe after the other, the year go on. You wonder where the road is. The road is under your feet.
T.S.E.J: You uonder where the road is, the road is under your feet……
Original works by O Henry
Script by Zheng Yang Li Sicong Wan Xiao Liang Qimei
Stage lighting by
Stage properties by
Rear service by
（Anthony is answering the phone. His servant, Mike, was standing besides him and waiting for his order）
Give him money and tell him to follow my words. I don’t care about his ideas! Tell him that he’s working for me, Anthony, the richest one of the city! （he puts down the phone rudely and turns to Mike）
Tell my son to come in here before he leaves the house.
（Mike walks out of the room. Richard Rockwall knocks at the door. Anthony lays down his newspaper, looks at Richard with a kindly grimness, rumpled his white hair with one hand and rattled the keys in his pocket with the other.）。
Some people say it takes three generations to make one gentleman, What do you think, my son?
They are right, Dad. There are things that money can’t accomplish.
Anthony （Stand up and walks from the left to the right angrily）：
No, don't say that. I’ve searched through the dictionary down to the letter Y for something you can't buy with money, and I failed. Tell me something money won't buy.
（Richard signed and didn’t answer）
Anthony （Calms down）：
And that's what I was coming to, That's why I asked you to come in. There's something going wrong with you, boy. Is there anything going wrong with you, sonny?
I’m ok, dad . If you don’t have anything else to ask me……
Can’t fool me, Richard. I've been noticing it for two weeks.（pause） Is it your liver again? With my money, I can easily make you surrounded by a dozen of doctors.
That’s a bad guess……
Then, tell me, what’s her name?
It does’nt even matter now. I just don’t have the chance. She belongs to the noble circles, every hour and minute of her time must be arranged in advance. And I can't write to tell her about my love--I can't do that.
Tut! Do you mean to tell me that with all the money I've got you can't get an hour or two of a girl's time for yourself?
I've put it off too late. She's going to Europe the day after tomorrow for a two years' stay. I'm to see her alone tomorrow evening for a few minutes. I'm allowed to meet her with a cab at the Grand Central Station tomorrow evening at 8:30. We drive down Broadway to the theater, where her mother will be waiting for us in the lobby.
Maybe she would listen to a declaration from you during that time.
Within six or eight minutes under those circumstances? Dad, your money can’t help this time. We can't buy one minute of time with cash. There's no hope of getting a talk with Miss Lantry before she sails.
All right, Richard, my boy, you can go now. I just believe that fortune must fall upon a gentleman like you. Cheer up, my son.
I hope so, Dad.
（Richard walks to the door and begins to sing the song[rhythm of the rain]）：
Oh the only girl i've ever loved has gone away
Looking for a brand new start
Little does she know that when she left that day
Along with her she took my heart
（The light fades. Aunt Ellen comes to visit Anthony, and she meets Richard outside Anthony’s door ）
Yes, Aunt Ellen?
（Aunt Ellen searches for her pocket and takes out a box .From the box she takes out an old ring and gives it to Richard）
Your farther has told me all about it , Wear it tomorrow, Nephew .Your mother gave it to me. Good luck in love she said it brought. She asked me to give it to you when you had found the one you love.
（Richard took it and tried it on his little finger. It slipped as far as the second joint and stopped. He took it off and stuffed it into his vest pocket）
Thank you, Aunt Ellen. I’ll wear it tomorrow
（Aunt Ellen opens the door of Anthony’s room and walks in. Anthony was reading newspapers. Aunt Ellen sits down on the sofa.）
My sister, I told Richard that my bank account was at his service, but he said that in this case it wouldn’t help at all.
Come on brother. Love is all-powerful. What are you gonna do? Let him give her parents 1 million dollars and…beg?
No, that sounds stupid! For that kind of girl, at least 2 million.
Come on. Forget about your theory of the mammon! （she begins to sing the song[love will keep us alive]）
When we’re hungry, love will keep us alive
（The light dies down. and when it becomes bright again, we see Miss Lantry standing in the middle of the stage. Acoustics: noises from different people. Richard runs to her）
We mustn't keep mamma and the others waiting
（takes her hand and helps her to the cab）
Richard （to the cabman）：
To Wallack's Theatre as fast as you can drive!
（They sit silently for a few seconds.）
Richard （to the cabman）：
（to Miss Lantry）：
I’m sorry, but I've dropped a ring .It was my mother's, and I hate to lose it. I won't detain you a minute--I saw where it fell.
You may go ahead, Mr Rockwall.
（Richard gets off the cab and picks up the ring on the ground, and then returns to the cab. Acoustics: noises of the stopping of a car. The three people lean to the left and then to the right. Acoustics: noises from hundreds of cars, horses and people.）
Miss Lantry （impatiently）
Why don't you drive on? We'll be late!…
I’m sorry Ms, but we’re stuck in a traffic jam. Look at all those cabs and cars and trucks! Dear me, I promise this is the most terrible traffic jam I’ve ever come across!" it seems impossible for us to move on even a little bit!
（Richard stands up and looks around .He sits down again and turns to Miss Lantry）。
I'm very sorry, but it looks as if we are stuck. It was my fault. If I hadn't dropped the ring we—
Forget it. Now that it can't be helped, I don't care. I think theatres are stupid, anyway. Let me see the ring. You said it was your mother`s. There must be a beautiful story behind it. By the way, is it a real diamond?
Yeah, it`s the engagement ring of my parents, （he puts the ring onto Miss Lantry’s palm carefully and begins to sing the song [love story] ）：
Where do I begin
to tell a story of how great a love can be
the sweet love story that is older than the sea
（The light dies down）
（Anthony was in his room, reading a novel. Aunt Ellen walks in）
Aunt Ellen （cheerfully）：
They're engaged, Anthony .she promised to marry our Richard. On their way to the theatre there was a street blockade, and it was two hours before their cab could get out of it. He spoke to his love and won her there during that time.
All right I'm glad the boy has got what he wanted. I told him I wouldn't spare any expense in the matter if--"
But, Brother Anthony, what good could your money have done? The ring was the cause of our Richard finding his happiness. He dropped it in the street, and got out to recover it. And before they could continue, the blockade occurred. Money is dross compared with true love, Anthony.
Anthony （waves the novel in his hand to Aunt Ellen）：
Look , My sister, here my Captain Jack Sparrow is in danger, so would you allow me to finish what I was reading?
（The light dies down）
（The light becomes bright again. The stage is divided into two halves, on the left half of the stage, Kelly is knocking at the door of Anthony’s room）
Come in, Kelly. Well done. And how much shall I pay you for the traffic jam?
Six thousand dollars, Sir. Five dollars for each wagon, and the same for cabs; ten dollars for trucks and two-horse teams; the motorman wanted twenty, and the rest ones were twenty-five.
Anthony （tears off a check）：
Well done, Kelly. I heard that they created the biggest traffic jam of the century : there must be two hours before a snake could move through the street! And I ‘ll give you extra 500 dollars for your arrangement.
Come on, we’re friends! You know I`m not that kind of person…… How much did you say it was?!（he takes the check）
（On the other half part of the stage, archer is knocking at mammon’s door）
Come in, and how much shall I pay you for the engagement of Richard and Miss Lantry, Archer?
Six thousand dollars, Mammon. 1000 dollars for the love story, and the sentence "I love you" that he had said to Miss Lantry costs 2000, and my arrow which shot into Miss Lantry’s heart at the same time was 3000.
Mammon （tears off a check）：
Well done, archer. You created the honeyed words and they got engaged. I give you extra 500 dollars for your arrangement.
Come on, we’re friends! You know I`m not that kind of person…… How much did you say it was?!!（he takes the check and begins to sing the song [moonriver]:
Old dream maker
You heart breaker
Wherever your goin'
I'm goin' your way
Mammon （also sings the song [moonriver]）：
We're after the same
Waitin' round the bend,
My huckleberry friend, archer and me.
（ The End）
Daughter of the Sea
Scene 1 Sea Palace
Grandma: Finally, you’re back! How’s the shopping on the ground?
Little Mermaid: Well, the supermarket is really fantastic! Let’s see what I’ve got… This is the fried fish, and this is the spicy hamburger from McDonald, and here, （holding the tape-recorder） WOW! Hi-tech product!
Grandma: Cool, and we won’t worry about our dinner today. What’s more, did you see anything unusual there?
Little Mermaid: Sure! The storm came and a ship was nearly destroyed!
Grandma: Well, that’s commonplace. Go and swim with your sisters now!
Little Mermaid: Thanks, grandma.
Scene 2 Seashore
（Narrate: Little mermaid doesn’t tell Grandma more about the ship. She also saw the people who drowned in the sea. Among them there was a handsome young man with big blue eyes and curl hair. Little Mermaid soon fell in love with him, and saved him by sending him to the seashore）
Little Mermaid （dragging the prince）： He’s sure heavy! （Throwing the prince onto the shore）
（A woman comes along, and Little Mermaid hides herself behind a board, which reads" You can’t see me". The prince wakes up）
Woman: Oh! You’re alive!
Prince: Sure am I! You saved me?
Woman: Come on, this way!
（Prince goes away, and Little Mermaid puts the board down, sits still, sadly）
（Duck Ugly passes by）
Duck Ugly: Badibadidibadidibadididido…（knocks into Little Mermaid） Oh! Sorry.
Little Mermaid: Why are you so happy, Duck Ugly?
Duck Ugly: Because I’m going to the clinic of the Sea Wizard! He’s gonna turn me into a beautiful goose!
Little Mermaid: That’s wonderful! How can I contact him?
Duck Ugly: You may call 5643456 at any time of the day. Also you can visit his private website, and the IP address is www.wizard.com.
Scene 3 At the Wizard’s
Little Mermaid: Excuse me, but is this Sea Wizard’s house?
（No one answered）
（Little Mermaid comes in, only to find that there is a monk saying something rapidly in a low voice, with his right hand holding a bunch of prayer beads）
Little Mermaid: Sir! What are you doing?
（Music on. Backstreet’s "I want it that way", the monk dances to the music）
Monk: Er-Mi-Tuo-Buddha! I am the wizard of the sea. What do you want, darling?
Little Mermaid: You! Why, I’ve never seen you before!
Monk: That’s true. I’m an exchange wizard from China. Anything wrong with you, girl?
Little Mermaid: Yeah. I’d like to turn my tail into legs, and can you give me a hand with it?
Monk: That’s easy. （Takes out a broad saber）
（Light off, and a sharp voice can be heard）
Monk: All right! You have them now!
Little Mermaid: Thank you, sir! （Leaving）
Monk: One more thing. From now on, you owe me something! God bless you, I just can’t remember what it is according to the writer. Well, go as you wish. Er-Mi-Tuo-Buddha!
Scene 4 In the Prince’s House
（Narrate: Little Mermaid successfully gets into the prince’s house because of her beauty, and soon the prince regards her as his best friend. But the prince is ordered to marry another woman at once in order to be the king of this country. On hearing this Little Mermaid is extremely sad. One day, however, she met with the wizard）
Monk: I don’t think you are living a good life here. As I can see, the prince is going to marry another person, not you. And as a result of that, you will have to die if he really does. （Takes out the saber, passes it to Little Mermaid） The only way to solve the problem is to kill him. Understood?
Little Mermaid: （nodded slightly）…
（In the prince’s bedroom. The prince is sleeping heavily. Little Mermaid goes up to him quietly）
Little Mermaid: Oh, love! To kill, or not to kill, that is the question. （Hesitates for a while, then begins to attack）
Prince: （Suddenly jumps up and protects himself with his own sword） You dare attack me! Speak to my sword!
（The two begins to fight. During the fight, they hurt each other badly. Finally, both of them die）
（The monk goes up, and put two handkerchiefs on their faces）
Monk: Sigh! Er-Mi-Tuo-Buddha!